True self-love, is the ability to recognize our true value. It is not arrogance or selfishness. True self-love allows us to feel that we are as equally worthy of love and respect as anyone else, regardless of what society may dictate. As we gain a healthy level of self-love we release the need to feel insecure, jealous, unlovable or the need of anyone’s approval. We are in a place of peace where we feel love for others as well as ourselves. Imagine how wonderful the world would be if everyone could feel the abundant joy of unconditional self-love.
All of our lives we have held certain beliefs about our self-value and lovability. Many of us blame circumstances, or someone else for our low self-worth. Often, we allow the opinions, or what we perceive to be the opinions of others, to influence our self-image and value. We often put a higher value on the needs and opinions of others over our own. The truth is that no matter what others say or do, ultimately we are the only one who will decide what we will believe to be true. Our ego, which is that voice in our head, that keeps telling us that we are not good enough, or that we should be afraid of something. Guilt, worry, jealousy, and anger all come from a place of fear, which infect us like viruses and block us from our intuition. Recognizing when we are having negative feelings and thoughts is the first step in taking control of our self-talk and our outlook. The more often we notice and change our thoughts from something negative to something positive, the easier it becomes. We have the power to choose our thoughts rather than to allow the negative self-talk to keep us in the prison of our own making.
Forgiveness is the key to true peace. Forgiveness is not excusing anything, but choosing to be free of negative feelings. It is extremely important for our self-love to learn to forgive ourselves. Each time we feel badly because we said or did something that we wished we hadn’t, we should remember to forgive our self and move on. See it as a learning experience, and that we are getting better. This may seem very hard, but many people have found that, with practice, it gets easier to relax and avoid repeating that same type of undesirable behavior. Learning to forgive others for things they did or said seems very hard too, especially with people we dislike. First, we must have a strong desire to truly want to forgive, realizing that it is the loving thing to do, and that everyone benefits from our forgiveness. Yes, we benefit from the love and tolerance we show rather than creating more anger and other negative emotions. No one would ever do anything to hurt another if they were truly at peace. This helps us to see our self as powerful rather than as a victim. We must realize how much influence we have in our world, decide how much we want to help make the world more peaceful, and how much effort we are willing to put into doing our part to create a loving and peaceful world.
Every minute of every day we make choices. We have a choice to either see good or bad in every situation. Our attitude about everything we experience is key. In his book, “The Surrender Experiment”, Michael Singer teaches us how much energy we waste resisting things we don’t like and accept things as they are, including people and circumstances. Our attitude causes our happiness as well as our misery about any subject. We can choose to be peaceful regardless of the situation. This is not easy since we’ve had this view for so long, often without realizing it. Circumstances don’t matter. They are neutral. How we choose to respond to them is what matters. When we practice looking for the good, we can begin to get through almost all day, every day without experiencing upsetting or negative situations or people. According to the “Law of Attraction”, we attract what we focus on. So if we believe and expect bad or unpleasant things to appear in our life, that’s what we’ll get most of the time. We actually attract it. Our subconscious believes whatever we tell it, whether we say it out loud or just to ourselves. So if we say things like, “I’m always late”, “They won’t like me”, or “I’m always getting sick”, guess what we are attracting? Our subconscious will give us what we ordered.
The things we choose to have in our life, such as friends and media, have a big influence on us. We can choose to attract more positivity into our lives, by reading books that help to uplift. We can attend classes and find new friends who share similar ideas. While staying informed on world events, we can refuse to be inundated with negativity. Media outlets know that drama sells. That’s why here is so much of it. We become addicted to the drama. Instead, we can keep a gratitude journal, meditate, pray, listen to music that helps us feel joy, dance, enjoy nature, and find fun ways to exercise. There are so many positive things to read and watch when we look for them. It’s amazing how much of a difference that makes. Having a positive attitude should be our priority in life. How can it be helpful to anyone if we are always in a bad mood?
The key to experiencing pure and unconditional self-love, is to PRACTICE believing that we are worthy. In order to reprogram our brain, we must practice every day, just as we would in learning to play a musical instrument. Abundance is the natural state of the universe. We need to remember that there is an abundance of everything that we want. The only thing keeping it from us is our limiting beliefs. As we learn to love ourselves more, we open up our connection with our higher self through our intuition.
“Our willingness to feel love, for ourselves and others, opens us not only to the Infinite Intelligence, but also to the unlimited abundance of the Universe”. Arnold Patent, author of, “You can Have it All”.
Article Provided By Seminar Speaker Nancy Cohen. See Nancy in person during her seminar, “Understanding Personality Types” at 4:00pm on Saturday, February 23rd.
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